You are here: John Clark Online > Ezine > What's Holding Me Back? (2)

What's Holding Me Back? (2)

March 31, 2004

In the last issue of BEYOND THE GRAVY, I quoted Marianne Williamson and Abraham Maslow:  

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us." - Williamson

 

"We fear our highest possibility (as well as our lowest ones). We are generally afraid to become that which we can glimpse in our most perfect moments." - Maslow 

I asked if you agreed. My warm thanks to all who replied.

"I struggle mightily," wrote Royce, "with my motives as to why I do not break this stranglehold." Most respondents echoed that sentiment. It seems that virtually everyone is immensely frustrated by the mystery of what is holding them back.

Few agreed with Williamson and Maslow. A typical view was expressed eloquently by Mikal: "I'm not sure I do agree.  I think I'm more afraid of finding out that my dreams are more than I'm capable of doing.  If I try, and find out I'm not good enough, then my dreams are gone. At least now I have my dreams.  If I lose them, what am I left with but despair?" Brendon wondered if a feeling of inadequacy underpins resistance: "One point that I have considered is that people have a fear of achieving because they feel that they are not good enough for it/don't deserve it."

Katie was one of the few respondents who resonated to what Williamson and Maslow were saying: "My highest possibility, if fulfilled, would separate me from all that is comfortable - friends, family, 'normal' people living 'normal' lives in 'normal' careers. The thought of being so on my own terrifies me." In similar vein, Alan wondered if he pulls back from pursuing big goals not because he fears failure (he is an optimist) but because, "What if it really works? It's about going down an unfamiliar path where it is really hard to turn back and the consequences are unknown."

Susan was excited by the notion that it is fear of her highest possibility that holds her back: "What if my anxiety isn't some horrible fear of failure, but the dreadful excitement that is shared by the Broadway star, the prima ballerina, the top executive, as they engage in the most challenging but thrilling parts of their existence? What if the little voice inside of me that thinks I am capable of ... something, a special something ... is right? What if? What if...?"

Next issue of BEYOND THE GRAVY: why the scholar Ernest Becker agreed with Maslow.

Read other ezine issues